Anyone who knows me well, or even casually, probably has heard me voice my disdain for the Food Network's experiment in douchebaggery that is Guy Fiery. I call him an experiment because that clearly the only explanation for this man. One day, a focus group comprised of 40+ year old southern and Midwestern housewives was locked in a room with sacks of body parts, assorted foodstuffs and a deep fryer, then told to create a man and a menu that "the kids would go crazy for". After 34 excruciating hours, their mission was complete: They gave him attitude, but the right kind of homogenized family-friendly attitude that stood up to the status quo, but only within reason... Leather studded bracelets, lots of rings and a gold chain. They wanted him to be "in your face" like the kid's say, but approachable and harmless. His original hair style was to be a Billy Ray Cyrus mullet, but a phone call to Phyllis' 8 year old granddaughter shifted their mindset towards "frosted tips" because she had a crush on an older boy at school with that haircut. His personal style came next, but unfortunately, the focus group was only supplied with a few boxes of left over clothing from Chess King, the now defunct Times Square WWF store and a bunch of Jeff Gordon merchandise from his DuPont years.
Finally, there is his "food". I cannot do any better than New York Times restaurant critic Pete Wells, so I'll simply provide a link to his recent review of Guy's great big times square sparkling turd. http://www.nytimes.com/2012/11/14/dining/reviews/restaurant-review-guys-American-kitchen-bar-in-times-square.html?pagewanted=1
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| EXTREME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
If Guy Fieri were a headlining rock band, his openers would be Nickel back and Smash mouth.
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